For the first time I have taken down a blogpost.

It was about my attitude to the events here in Paris and their possible ramifications.  I took it down because I am frankly lost in it all.

At times I have felt very sure of my take on it.  At others I am not sure at all and just feel sad, vulnerable and far from home.  Everything seems to have changed and things that were taken for granted are no longer sure or certain.

There are, however, a few things I know:

I know I’m going to die one day and I don’t want my life to end by being shot while I’m having a drink outside a café.

I know that the subject/object divide is, ultimately, an illusion and that death, especially at the hands of another, is probably the most difficult aspect of that illusion to understand.

I know that the only constant is change and that nothing is static and that sometimes the suddenness of change is difficult to take in.

I am not too proud to admit that what’s happened has shaken and frightened me.

I will keep on chanting mantra and meditating.  I guess it’s my way of praying and that there’s a lot of that going on right now.

Om Tare Tuttare Ture Soha